A good friend of mine had a baby about six months ago. She grappled with the very difficult decision to take proactive steps in returning to a healthy weight. When she told me of her decision, she almost sounded ashamed and defensive. Oh dear friend, I do not judge ye. On the contrary, I commend you for your decision to take a healthy path and set realistic goals for yourself! That said, I will relay a bit of wisdom I received from encouraging friends and health professionals alike. To all new moms, and moms just given birth out there, remember: it took nine months to put it on. (It has taken me almost a year to take it off)
All too often, women judge themselves not by the quality of their character, but by the amount of burden they can take upon themselves and still look like a centerfold (ie. I can be a mother, work full-time, cook a gourmet meal when I get home and keep my house looking spotless and Martha-esque meanwhile maintaining an acceptable size 0-6 frame and wearing fashionable heels!) I have fallen victim to this trap, too. I have to constantly remind myself that I am not wonder woman.
It is sad that we live in the kind of society that celebrates and reveres women in the spotlight who appear on red carpets only days postpartum down to their previous size 0 (yoga and vegan diet my a*%). Its not magic, it is $$$ and science.
Dear friend (and me) please remember just what kind of woman you really want to be. A reliable wife and friend, an attentive and patient mother...the kind of woman who makes it all look effortless not because she made a tremendous effort but because she really valued what is important in life: being present and available, and having time for the loved ones in her life.
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Thank you my friend. I agree with everything you said. I was thinking after I wrote my post that what I forgot to write was that I am so incredibly lucky... I didn't make this choice for anyone but myself. I have an amazing husband who has told me more than once a day that I am the most beautiful woman in the world. I decided to do this for myself. Only because I was wanting to feel a little more comfortable in my body and be healthier for my daughter. For that I am so incredibly grateful. I am so happy that I didn't have anyone pressuring me, I am truly the luckiest woman in the world. Thank you for being such a wonderful friend.
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