6 Months Old

Joseph is six months old today, and he has made some huge strides in his development recently. He is almost crawling, he is as good as sitting up on his own, and we finally got him to sleep in his own crib by a combo of the Ferber and Common Sense methods.

Success

We have been attempting to give Joseph solids for some time now, about once every week and a half or so and starting of course with rice cereal at the suggestion of our pediatrician. But like the doctor said, and all the manuals say: you must watch for signs that your child is ready (ie. holding head up, swallowing food instead of pushing it out, razzing, etc.)

So far Joseph has only seemed marginally interested in solids; more skeptical than anything else. He was indifferent to rice cereal, gagged on mashed avocado, but somewhat enjoyed Gerber bananas and peaches. However, he mostly just moved the food around with his tongue and ultimately pushed most of it back out. Not to mention that he really didn't seem to understand that he must open his mouth to get the food into it from the spoon. As a result, we haven't really been very enthusiastic about solids and have instead assumed that Joseph is just not ready yet.

Well, yesterday we had success in the solid department. I mixed up a bowl of rice cereal with formula and Gerber peaches and Joseph almost finished the whole thing (about a 1/2 cup worth)! What this means for us is that we can now get a little more excited and adventurous with foods. I recently purchased a first foods cookbook and am waiting to receive a food mill and freezing supplies in the mail...and then we'll really be cookin'.

blik in the Bedroom

No this is not a euphemism. Although we did go a little blik-wild. I am posting this so Joe can see what I did with the bedroom blik and hopefully gain his approval.

All bliked Out

Keeping Busy...

Here are a few projects I have been working on (I am channeling my energy into non-business things lately). The knitted things and tees I will most likely sell. I also finished blik-ing my office. I am not an artistic person (unlike Joe) hence the blik-ing. I think it turned out pretty good, though. Gotta go, more blik-ing to do!

Go Pack!

Almost Crawling (Please Don't Grow Up)

As you can see, Joseph James is more than ready to start movin'! He's almost hit the ol' 6-month mark...
My heart is so full it's breaking. I love my family. I love being a Dad. I'm starting to understand that "love" isn't a strong enough word.

JJ's New Friend

This morning JJ discovered a bear in his crib. It is a cream one that says "God Bless Baby" that my mom got for him. It has been in his crib for a while now, but today is the first time that JJ noticed him and since he has not let go. Incidentally, this has also been JJ's quitest morning in a very long time. God Bless Baby, indeed!

The Mommy Sweater

This is a sweater that I knit for Joseph while I was still pregnant. He can finally fit into it, so I put it on him today. It may look a little girly on him, but I think it is cute. Boy...what a weird feeling!

Just Because...

Big Boy Chair

Here is the solution (albeit temporary) to our little grabby-grabby Bam Bam situation. And it is a necessity too, as JJ is eating solids more frequently. Here is our little man. He is growing so fast, and yet he looks so tiny in his big boy chair!

Look at what I can do!

I realize it has been a while since I last posted. We all have been very busy. Not to mention that a dream of mine to run my own business was very close to becoming a reality, as in it was going to be happening within a couple of months or so. We were all caught up in the whimsy of possibility, and we almost for got (or should I say I almost forgot) what was important.

All last week was spent in front of the computer. I was busy doing "research" for my business, making appointments to scout out possible locations and attending classes at Waukesha Tech. to learn what I need to do to make things happen. Meanwhile, Joseph had some developments of his own going on...I almost missed them!

For starters, I would leave him on the floor in his gym nearby while I was on the computer. I would turn back after a couple of minutes only to find him flipped over and facing a totally different direction. That's right. He regularly rolls over from back to tummy now, and I have only seen him do it once.

In addition, he is growing to be a very strong boy! "Ow!" is a word heard much more often around the Myers household these days, especially while Joseph is playing with mommy's hair. He has become so coordinated and strong that I wonder how he has managed not to pull it all out. He also has become like Bam Bam in that he loves to bang on things (including mommy's head and face).

He is very clever. When we put him in his bumbo on the table we make a point of leaving a couple of toys on his lap so that he is not tempted to grab non-toys. However, his favorite thing to play with is our basket full of bills. He loves to pull it, grab things out of it and dump it over. If the telephone or DS is on the table, those too become his favorite playthings. I tried to fool him by giving him my old cell phone to play with...the joke was on me. It was as if he knew and took no interest in it at all!

My dream job is still in the works, only it isn't going to happen yesterday. After some serious consideration we all decided that I should really slow down a bit. I have to admit that it is a relief to know that I can go back to focusing (at least for now) on what is really important: spending my time with my boy, watching him grow, and being grateful that we have this time together.

JJ's Future Wife

We met the Schwenzen's newest addition last week. We forgot to take pictures in the hospital of little Hadley Margaret, but click the link above so you can see her. Isn't she a doll!

Yum.

Rice Cereal Attempt 2: Subject appears to still be depositing more of food matter onto face than what actually ends up in desired orifice. Take this to mean subject is not yet prepared for such a transition. Will proceed with new attempts weekly...

Getting Over Myself: A Tale from the Dad Side

WIthout a doubt, I have decided that there are three Great Things that have happened to me thus far in my life: Being born into an amazing family, meeting/marrying Melissa, and contributing to the creation and birth of our amazing son, Joseph James. And underlying everything: Great and supportive friends. I am a very lucky man, indeed. Lucky, and, to be honest, a bit confused. Just when I thought I had my brain wrapped around this whole marriage thing (not an easy task, especially when the likes of me is mixed with a wonderful force of nature like Melissa), here comes Joseph. My partial namesake. A healthy, happy boy. An amazing son through whom I can vicariously live. A reason for being.

To a certain extent, I’ve been able to charm my way through life, but those days are behind me... aren’t they? Please, God, let them be far behind me. I am done with the selfishness and I am thankful! All I want is to be a good husband and father. All I want is to be half the men that my brother and father are. I want to be a role-model of the highest caliber. But wait a minute: Isn’t there anything I NEED? Shouldn’t I need all of these things, like one needs oxygen or love? Or, are my wants and needs the same? Maybe this is what it’s like to Be A Man. I think I’ve finally gotten a good choke-hold on my two main demons – Alcohol abuse and living with Multiple Sclerosis – but they’re not dead yet. These will be things I deal with for the rest of my life and, believe it or not, I am thankful. These challenges will be on my shoulders forever, keeping me humble and honest. I am fallible. There is no Sun hidden inside of me, casting light on the world and coloring it Joe. Now the Sun is My Son, coloring everything Joseph. Selfishness be damned! I am no longer an island.

But... can’t I play my video games and read my comic books and have a couple of beers without feeling a sharp pang of guilt? Am I so desperate to hold on to my past that I am denying its slow death? Or am I allowed to be young at heart and still be a Good Man? Need or Want? Dramatic or honest?

WHO AM I?

Will my wife love and respect me until the day we die? Will my son look up to me and think I’m strong and cool and fun, all the while respecting the fact that I am his father? Will this stupid, nagging phantom that is MS finally get the better of me?

(I’ll never forget seeing a semi on I-43 proudly proclaiming: “MS Carriers: Delivering Your Future”)

...

As I write this, my son is looking at me with love in his eyes, as if to say “Stop, Dad. Just stop. Mom and I will always love you.”

How could I think otherwise? There is no other shoe and it will not drop.

Greetings From the Naughty Corner

Ah, it is the age old debate between and among parents of what to protect their children from, and what to expose them to. For the most part, Joe and I agree; we will be moderately liberal in our exposure of the real world to our children. We share a similar beloved memory of seeing "The Shining" uncut at a very young age. It is still one of our favorite movies. And I think back fondly to a time when my father sat me down in front of the television at age five to watch Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video. I may have been curled up under a blanket on the floor in the fetal position for the duration of the video but I will be darned if the next thing I asked for from my parents wasn't the "Thriller" album!

One area that is a little more gray for us is language. When do we start to censor ourselves in front of Joseph, and what words to censor? Now don't get me wrong, I don't plan on prancing around and spouting George Carlin's Seven Dirty Words in front of my kids, nor any of the other big forbiddens, but there are a few others that have emerged as no-no's in this day and age that come as a surprise to me. Words like "stupid" and "hate."

As kids, we were not protected from such words in our household and I still turned out okay (at least I think so). But, yesterday at a friends house I let the word "stupid" slip in front of the hostess's 4 year old daughter. The little girl reprimanded me "don't say 'stupid'!" and then asked her mother if I needed to go to the Naughty Corner among eruptions of laughter by the other guests. It brought me back to a rather unpleasant memory of reading a book as a child and having an adult correct me when I came across that same word in the text: "it's 'silly', Missy, not 'stupid'." Oh, the shame I felt at knowing that I did something wrong, but not even realizing I had done it until the damage was done. I don't want Joseph to ever know that shame.

So that brings me back to my original questions. Guessing by my 4-year-old disciplinarian's reaction, the time to censor myself is now. And what words to censor? That is not so much up to me as it is up to the parents of the children that my kids will interact with. So now it is the responsibility of all the other little dilinquents at daycare or on the playground to expose young Joseph to such "naughty" words, not mine! I ponder these things and more from my self-imposed punishment in the Naughty Corner...

Things I Know Now

I got this idea recently at a baby shower. Someone had the novel idea to have all the guests write down a bit of advice for the mother-to-be and presented them to her in an album. I came up with a very cliche nugget of wisdom, but after hearing some of the other pieces of advice offered up by the guests it occurred to me that I know all kinds of weird things and practical bits now that I didn't then. Here are just few (consider this advice if you are considering parenting a very young person):

1) Contractions remind me most of really bad food poisoning I had once in Dublin.
2) Giving birth makes you HUNGRY (those prenatal books don't lie) as in "I could eat cold leftovers off of the floor" hungry.
3) If you need to cheer up a bit, use a breast pump-you might find the first few uses to be endlessly amusing.
4) Nursing is a HUGE commitment. Going anywhere for longer than 2 hours (for the first 3 months) without baby is tricky because even if you know that the baby has plenty of milk somewhere else, your breasts do not.
5) The best programming to be found between 2-4am is on either BBC America or Noggin.
6) We would never watch TV anymore if it weren't for DVR.
7) Being a mother does not mean that you neglect your own needs. It is difficult to care for a baby if you are not well-rested and taken care of yourself!
8) It is a good idea to keep a stroller in your house. When all else fails to calm your fussy baby, pushing them around in one will probably work.
9) Folds of baby flesh go deep. Pay special attention to the almost nonexistent neck whilst washing baby.
10) Do not purchase/use cradle cap ointment, (if you see Pooh characters on the label back away slowly) especially if your baby has a lot of hair. That is unless you like the smell of Aqua Net on your baby for a week or more.

Nothing Stinks About Our Baby

Its all good.

Take That!

I'll be brutally honest here. Things were not easy for me after Joseph was born. The adjustment to motherhood was no more or less difficult than I had expected, but I just didn't feel right for a few weeks. I could have easily ignored my feelings (or lack thereof) but I didn't, I got help and now I feel just like me again, only with child. That is so much better than I could have expected!

In addition to these baby-induced changes in me, I am also (finally) dealing with a lot of other issues as well. None of these are issues are exclusive, mind you, they are all linked. One of these issues is my social anxiety.

It seemed to come out of nowhere, and for no good reason sometime about midway through my undergraduate studies. It was far less frequent or intense then, but it came to be around that time just the same. Over the years it has come and gone, spurred on by many random and unexpected triggers. Lately it has intensified again to the point where seeing my family and friends (who I am very familiar with) has even caused me to turn into a ball of nerves.

I have been given a project. Go to the local family resource center play group four times. I went for the first time last week. In the morning I got up, showered, had my coffee, and was getting ready to go. Oh, no, there go those gut feelings again...but they are different this time. Could that be...excitement?!

I went and it was no big thing. As a matter of fact there was only one other mother there, a woman from Austria who was very nice and I am looking forward to seeing her again. I emerged from my initial experience triumphant. I signed up for another mommy group and am anxiously awaiting the end of the week when I will make my second attempt at the play group.

Joseph and I went out into the world 4 times last week which is some kind of record for us. I feel great, I feel better than great. I feel like me again. Take that, social anxiety!

Joseph James the Two-Faced Boy

 Gotta love it!

Mommy's Hair

My hair has become Joseph's new favorite plaything. I don't recall how I made this discovery exactly, I only know that he reacts to my hair dangling in his face or brushing against it with delight. It has become one of our little games. I dangle my hair in his face and he squeals, sighs, and his arms and legs move spasmodically. I find it to be very flattering and endearing, unless it turns ugly. On more than one occasion I have had to call on Joe to assist me in disengaging Joseph's little fists from my hair. Once he had handfuls on either side of my head, he pulled me close to him and was (involuntarily...I think) kicking my head repeatedly. Afterward, I ask myself "why does he like my hair so much" as I run a hand through my abused mane finding little wet spots here and there from where he attempted to eat it.

Apparently it is only my locks that Joseph reacts to in this way as both G-ma M and Dad have tried to elicit the same response from him without consequence. Maybe my hair just tickles him, or he loves it because it smells like mom?! Regardless of the reason, this seems to be his current passion (could have saved a fortune on toys)!

Happy Birthday to Me!

When we got home from a weekend in Cedarburg Sunday evening the phone rang around 8pm. I looked at the CID and saw that it was my sister calling. I thought to myself "Jeez, why is she calling so late?" I picked up the phone and she said she just had to make sure that she wished me a Happy Birthday. "Oh, yeah" I thought, "that's right, today is my birthday." I had to keep reminding myself all day. Earlier in the day I had been to a friends baby shower and at one point I recall standing in her kitchen and thinking to myself "what is the date today?...Oh yeah, the 7th (duh!)." I don't mean to imply that I didn't have a good birthday, I only mean to convey how different things are and how much my priorities have changed.

My mother-in-law shares the same birthdate as me, so we have made it a tradition for the four of us to go out to dinner. We did that again this year, only we did it on the 6th, and there were five of us this time. It was really nice indeed. I even got some wonderful gifts this year. A Nintendo DS, a gift certificate, and also a lovely necklace that I have been longing-for for some time now. And it didn't even bother me when I found my necklace dangling, broken from my neck the day after I received it (I was able to fix it later). This year I was almost more tickled by the cards I received than the gifts...but I say almost. It is amazing how things change...

Happy Holidays

This year the holidays blew by so quickly. Everything happened so fast, and they were really unlike any others before. We managed to get a small fake tree up and lit, but only one ornament made it to the tree, a gift from our friends the Schwenzens (expecting their first in Feb.) that was a special gift celebrating Joseph's first Christmas. I managed to wrap most of the gifts one frenzied afternoon, but Joseph's were unceremoniously presented to him in their original packaging (I am sure he didn't mind). There were a lot of little things, traditions, etc. that just didn't happen this year, but I wouldn't have had it any other way because this year we had the best gift of all: our son Joseph. It didn't really hit me until I realized that for the first time I wasn't the one getting the most presents (nor did I even care about presents). No, our son made out like a bandit this year. It was a great feeling after years of being jaded by the holidays to have a new reason to be happy and a very new perspective on love and family.

On the 23rd we went to Joe's parents house and spent some time with them, Andy and Jane, and their family. I got the privilege to witness Joseph and and his little cousin Ellie smile at each other after the gift opening and just before a family picture was taken. It was a special moment that I will remember for a long time. As usual we had a great time.

Then we were off to my parents house where we stayed overnight, through Christmas Eve, and then home on Christmas day. We had a lovely time there as well, and we got to spend some time with my sister, her husband, and my new nephew Ian.

The best part by far was finally meeting my little nephew Ian. He is only a week older than Joseph but I swear that kid knows everything. He gets the wisest most thoughtful expression on his face, especially when he was watching Joseph fuss and cry. It was like he was concerned and was wondering if there was anything he could do to help. The two cousins couldn't be more different. Ian is practically bald, he has huge eyes, and his crys sound completely different. Ian either grunts or lets out high pitched screams while Joseph is somewhere in between, but after spending some time around Ian he has begun to pick up the scream. There were a couple of special bonding moments when the two boys would look at each other and smile or reach out for the others hand, it was very sweet.

We had Monica, Scott and Ian come up to visit us in the Falls over night, as well as seeing them at my parents house on Christmas Eve. When the four of us would get together in the past (Monica, Scott, Joe and myself) we would have such a blast and we would be laughing the whole time. It was really nice to spend some special time with them when they came to our house, but I must admit that it was hard this year not to be able to just sit back, relax, have a few beers and joke around like we used to. I had very little time to talk to just Monica without distraction, but I am sure as the boys get older we will all have some more time together again.

To all of our family, close friends and loved ones, we hope your holidays were wonderful and we look forward to seeing or hearing from you in the new year!